How To Be A Woman By Jamaica Kincaid's The Short Story

This Is How To Be a Woman Jamaica Kincaids Girlthe Short Story Gi

This Is How to Be a Woman: Jamaica Kincaid’s “Girl” The short story “Girl” by Jamaica Kincaid is mainly based on society’s views on what a perfect woman looked like back then. It focuses on how a woman's greatest accomplishment is based on a life of domesticity. Throughout the whole story, a mother offers her daughter advice on how to be a “proper” woman. The story really helps you fully acknowledge how crucial these things were back in the 1970s for a woman to do. Women and men have always been treated differently.

Back in the day, a woman's only asset was to be a housewife and a mother; they weren't seen as anything more. Thankfully, now women have more freedom; we have proven we are so much more than what we used to be seen as. To begin with, double standards have always been a problem in society, and men have always been “in charge." Back then, it was even more prominent than it is now. In the times this story takes place, a woman’s manners and lifestyle were constantly judged, and all women had the same purpose: clean, cook, and give birth to babies. This short story focuses on how important these certain things were back then for women.

Throughout the story, the mother is giving advice to the daughter, the “Girl” in the title. Initially, she mentions how to wash certain clothes or cook certain foods, basic domestic advice. But as the story progresses and the mother continues with her advice, we can sense her opinion of her daughter. Kincaid states, “…this is how to hem a dress when you see the hem coming down and so to prevent yourself from looking like the slut I know you are so bent on becoming…” In this line, passive aggressiveness from the mother towards the daughter is evident, which ties back to her true feelings about her daughter.

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In Jamaica Kincaid’s “Girl,” the central conflict revolves around the societal expectations imposed on women and the internal struggle of the daughter as she navigates these rigid standards. This external conflict between generations and societal norms is vividly illustrated through the mother’s admonitions, which serve as both instructions and covert criticisms. The mother’s authoritative voice symbolizes the societal pressure that confers traditional gender roles as the only acceptable path for women, fostering a conflict in the daughter's emerging sense of identity. This essay examines how the conflict reflects broader themes of gender roles, societal control, and personal autonomy, emphasizing how the story encapsulates the tension between conforming to tradition and forging individual identity.

One of the most significant symbols in the story is the mother’s instructions themselves, which function as a motif for societal expectations placed on women. The repetitive directives, such as how to wash clothes, cook food, and behave properly, underscore the prescribed manner in which a “proper” woman must conduct herself. For example, the mother states, “this is how to do the laundry,” illustrating the crucial importance placed on domestic skills. These directives serve to reinforce the idea that a woman’s value lies within her domestic abilities and adherence to societal standards. The motif of domestic work symbolizes the societal hierarchy that confines women within the sphere of home and family, limiting their independence and personal choices. This motif underscores the internal conflict faced by the daughter, who might desire a different life but feels bound by external pressures.

Another critical symbol is the mother’s use of language, particularly her passive-aggressive tone and the subtle expression of her disapproval when instructing her daughter. Her comment, “so to prevent yourself from looking like the slut I know you are so bent on becoming,” employs derogatory language that reveals her internalized societal judgments about femininity and morality. This harsh language symbolizes the societal judgment and shame that women are subjected to, which internalizes within the mother and gets passed onto the daughter. The language acts as a symbol of the broader societal control over female sexuality and behavior, heightening the internal conflict within the daughter between her natural impulses and societal expectations.

The external conflict between the mother and daughter reflects societal conflict over gender roles, with the mother representing traditional societal norms, and the daughter embodying the nascent desire for autonomy. The mother’s unwavering adherence to prescribed roles symbolizes societal pressure, whereas the daughter’s possible resistance signifies the individual’s quest for identity beyond societal constraints. The resolution of this conflict is not explicitly depicted in the story but remains implicit—the daughter’s internal struggle continues as she absorbs these lessons. Her silence and internal processing suggest an underlying tension: the struggle to reconcile societal expectations with her developing self-awareness and individual desires.

This conflict reveals crucial insights into the story’s themes of gender identity, societal control, and personal autonomy. The mother’s instructions, laden with societal judgment, highlight the oppressive nature of traditional gender roles, which seek to control women’s bodies, sexuality, and behavioral expectations. The daughter’s internal conflict embodies the tension between conformity and the desire for independence—a common dilemma faced by women in patriarchal societies. The story’s minimalistic yet powerful depiction of these conflicts underscores how societal expectations can shape individual identities, often at the expense of personal freedom.

In conclusion, Jamaica Kincaid’s “Girl” vividly portrays the external conflict between societal norms and individual identity through the mother-daughter relationship. The symbolism of domestic instructions and language underscores the societal pressure to conform to traditional gender roles. The conflict highlights the broader themes of gender oppression, societal control, and the struggle for personal autonomy. The story’s enduring relevance lies in its reflection of ongoing debates about women’s rights and societal expectations, illustrating how internal and external conflicts shape identities and influence personal growth. Through this narrative, Kincaid challenges readers to consider the ways societal norms impose restrictions on women and how individuals might navigate or resist these limitations.

References

• Kincaid, Jamaica. “Girl.” The New Yorker, 1978.
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