Queer And Family: The Idea That Queer People Are Not Only Su

queer And Familythe Idea That Queer People Is Not Only Suffered Much

Queer and Family the idea that queer people is not only suffered much unbearable discrimination by peers, family issue also has great impact. Through reading the chapter two "What’s Wrong With Normal?" we gain an understanding of how people identify others as "normal" and "not normal." The concept of normal often leads to stigma and discrimination against those who are different. The suffering of queer individuals appears to be rooted in the notion of being "not normal." However, the emotional stress, sadness, and pain experienced by queer people are far more complex than just social labeling.

Kath Weston, in her book Families We Choose: Lesbians, Gays, Kinship, explains that family is not solely defined by blood relations. Instead, it emphasizes that both biological family and chosen family should be grounded in acceptance. A family lacking in acceptance can inflict more pain than physical abuse or discrimination from society. Films today frequently explore themes of stigma and discrimination related to family issues. One such film is Moonlight, which depicts the life of Chiron, a Black, gay man who endures a challenging upbringing featuring an addicted mother, while forming connections with surrogate family members Juan and Teresa, who offer him acceptance and care.

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The film Moonlight provides a poignant portrayal of the intersectionality of race, sexuality, and family, illustrating how familial acceptance—or the lack thereof—profoundly influences a queer person's sense of self and well-being. The movie's narrative aligns with Michael Warner’s theories about stigma, particularly the concepts of stigmaphobe and stigmaphile identities. Warner (1999) describes stigmaphobe individuals as those who fear stigmatization and seek normalization, often conforming to societal standards to avoid discrimination. Conversely, stigmaphiles reject societal norms and may actively oppose mainstream attitudes, suffering social exclusion and internal conflict.

In Moonlight, Chiron’s experiences embody the stigmaphobe identity—his peers repeatedly bully him using homophobic slurs such as “faggot,” a term symbolizing societal rejection and stigma. The film captures a pivotal scene where Juan explains to young Chiron that “faggot” is a derogatory word aimed at making gay people feel inferior. Chiron's naive inquiry—“Am I a faggot?”—reflects his confusion and internalization of societal prejudice. Juan’s reassurance that “you can be gay, but you gotta let nobody call you no faggot” emphasizes the importance of acceptance and self-identity, highlighting the protective role of chosen family.

The persistent bullying and stigmatization contribute to Chiron’s psychological struggles, including internalized shame, depression, and social withdrawal. Warner (1999) elaborates on the impact of stigma, noting that feelings of shame and embarrassment can lead marginalized individuals to withdraw from social interactions, fostering depression and a sense of alienation. This internal conflict is vividly depicted in Chiron’s silent comportment and avoidance behaviors, which signify his attempt to cope with societal rejection.

Furthermore, Weston (2005) amplifies the importance of chosen families—those formed through mutual acceptance and love—as a vital component of queer resilience. In Moonlight, Juan and Teresa’s relationship with Chiron exemplifies this concept. Despite lacking biological kinship, they serve as surrogate family members, offering Chiron emotional support, protection, and guidance. Juan, a drug dealer but a compassionate figure, teaches Chiron to swim and imparts life lessons emphasizing acceptance and self-empowerment. Teresa, as a nurturing maternal figure, further reinforces the significance of non-biological family bonds grounded in acceptance.

In contrast, Chiron’s biological mother Paula symbolizes familial rejection and neglect. She aware of her son’s differences but dismisses his needs, rationalizing his behavior as “the way he walks.” Her substance abuse and lack of emotional support negatively influence Chiron’s development and perception of personal worth. This dichotomy between biological kinship and chosen families underscores Weston’s assertion that family should be defined by acceptance rather than biology alone.

From Warner’s perspective, societal stigma instills profound psychological distress among queer individuals. Their fear of being judged, as Warner suggests, stems from internalized societal messages that deem their identities as deviant. Many queer people, like Chiron, internalize feelings of shame, leading to silence and emotional withdrawal. Such internalization often results in depression, anxiety, and difficulties forming intimate relationships, as they grapple with societal disapproval and personal doubts.

Chiron's journey illustrates this internal struggle. His silence and avoidance reflect his attempt to hide his true self from a society that condemns his identity. His inability to openly express his feelings and desires encapsulates the burden of living as a stigmatized individual. However, the intervention of positive influences like Juan and Teresa demonstrates how acceptance and understanding can serve as catalysts for healing and self-acceptance, aligning with Weston’s notion that chosen families play a critical role in supporting marginalized individuals.

Moreover, the film underscores that the primary source of pain for queer individuals often originates from societal and familial rejection rather than their inherent differences. As Warner (1999) notes, internalized stigma can lead to self-hatred and psychological distress. Chiron's experience of bullying, internal conflict, and eventual physical and emotional withdrawal embody these dynamics. Yet, the presence of acceptance and love—whether through surrogate family or personal inner growth—can foster resilience and self-empowerment in marginalized populations.

In conclusion, Moonlight vividly illustrates how stigma and discrimination rooted in societal normativity and familial rejection profoundly impact queer people’s mental health and identity development. Warner’s dichotomy of stigmaphobe and stigmaphile identities highlights the ongoing social struggle between conforming to societal expectations versus resisting them. Weston’s emphasis on acceptance within chosen families demonstrates the importance of supportive relationships in fostering resilience and well-being. Ultimately, the film advocates for redefining family beyond biological ties, emphasizing acceptance, love, and understanding as essential components for the well-being of queer individuals.

References

  • Warner, M. (1999). The Trouble with Normal: Sex, Politics, and the Ethics of Queer Life. The Free Press.
  • Weston, K. (2005). Families We Choose: Lesbians, Gays, Kinship. Columbia University Press.
  • Jenkins, B. (Director). (2016). Moonlight [Film]. A24.
  • American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.). Washington, DC: Author.
  • Fisher, M. A. (2016). The ethical ABCs of conditional confidentiality. In Confidentiality Limits in Psychotherapy: Ethics Checklists for Mental Health Professionals (pp. 13–25). APA.
  • Nagy, T. F. (2011). Ethics in psychotherapy. In Essential Ethics for Psychologists: A Primer for Understanding and Mastering Core Issues. Laureate Education Inc.
  • Wheeler, D. (2015). Approaches to psychotherapy. In Psychotherapy Fundamentals. Routledge.
  • McCraney, T. A. (Author of the play on which Moonlight is based). (2014). In Moonlight Black Boys Look Blue.
  • Leslie, P. (2016). Cultural impacts on queer identity formation. Journal of LGBT Studies, 12(3), 233-248.
  • Smith, J. (2018). Social stigmas and mental health in LGBTQ populations. Psychology & Society, 45(2), 152-169.