Communication Is A Continuous Process Of Expressing Needs

Communication Is A Continuous Process Expressing Your Needs And Solut

Communication is a continuous process. Expressing your needs and solutions is better received when using "I" messages instead of accusatory messages, which can cause a person to shut down and not communicate. Assertiveness, or assertion, involves standing up for personal rights and expressing thoughts, feelings, and beliefs in direct, honest, and appropriate ways that do not violate another person’s rights. Assertiveness includes the use of “I” messages, such as: “This is what I think,” “This is what I feel,” and “This is how I see the situation.” These messages express “who the person is” and are said without dominating, humiliating, or degrading the other person. Assertiveness involves respect, not deference.

Deference is acting in a subservient manner as though the other person is right or better simply because of age, power, experience, knowledge, or differences such as sex or race. Deference is present when people express themselves in self-effacing, appeasing, or overly apologetic ways. With assertion, one must communicate respect for oneself and others. There are six basic types of assertive messages. When communicating with a specific person, it is important to craft your six assertive messages to clarify what you truly want.

For example, “I want you to call when you are going to be late,” is an assertive “I” message that states a clear expectation. “I feel embarrassed when you criticize my clothes in front of my friends” is a “feel” statement that expresses emotion without attacking the other person. Mixed feelings statements acknowledge more than one emotion and explain their origins, such as: “I enjoy going out and doing things with you, yet I feel it is unfair that you frequently do not bring enough money and ask me to pay for you.”

Empathic assertion involves understanding the other person’s feelings and then expressing your own in a respectful manner. For example, “I know you said that you are angry and do not want to talk about it. However, I feel we need to talk about it when you feel ready.”

Confrontive assertion is used when there are contradictions between what a person says and does. An example would be: “I know you said you would teach the newer students some of the beginning information as part of your internship, yet you consistently put them off or do not show up for appointments.”

I language assertion is particularly useful when expressing difficult or negative feelings. An example could be: “When you cancel a weekend event with me because you say you are busy working and then I find out you went out with someone else, I feel rejected and humiliated. I need for you to be honest with me about why you do things, or our friendship could be damaged.”

Paper For Above instruction

Communication is a vital aspect of human interaction that perpetually unfolds in daily life, serving as the conduit through which needs, desires, and solutions are conveyed and understood. Central to effective communication is the use of assertive messaging, primarily through “I” statements, which promote clarity, respect, and mutual understanding. Assertiveness is distinguishable from deference, which involves subservience and self-effacement driven by age, power, or societal status. Differentiating assertive communication from deference is crucial because true assertiveness entails respecting oneself and others equally, fostering honest and open exchanges.

The six basic types of assertive messages provide a framework for expressing oneself appropriately in various contexts. The first type, “I want” statements, articulate specific desires without ambiguity, such as, “I want you to call when you are going to be late,” which communicates expectations clearly. Feel statements are instrumental in conveying personal emotions without blame, exemplified by statements like, “I feel embarrassed when you criticize my clothes in front of my friends,” which fosters understanding without antagonism. Mixed feelings statements acknowledge the complexity of emotions, recognizing that individuals often have conflicting responses to situations—an example being, “I enjoy going out and doing things with you, yet I feel it is unfair that you frequently do not bring enough money and ask me to pay for you.”

Empathic assertion is a nuanced form of communication that demonstrates consideration for the other person’s feelings while expressing one's own. For instance, stating, “I know you said that you are angry and do not want to talk about it. However, I feel we need to talk about it when you feel ready,” showcases respect for their emotional state and encourages dialogue.

Confrontive assertion addresses discrepancies between words and actions. An effective example is, “I know you said you would teach the newer students some of the beginning information as part of your internship, yet you consistently put them off or do not show up for appointments,” which calls attention to specific behaviors needing correction while maintaining respect.

I language assertions are particularly essential when dealing with difficult emotions, especially negative ones. These messages express feelings without attacking but clearly articulate the impact of another’s actions. For example, “When you cancel a weekend event with me because you say you are busy working and then I find out you went out with someone else, I feel rejected and humiliated. I need for you to be honest with me about why you do things, or our friendship could be damaged.” This approach emphasizes personal feelings and needs without resorting to blame or accusations.

Overall, cultivating these six types of assertive messages enhances interpersonal communication by fostering respect, understanding, and honesty. Practicing assertiveness can lead to healthier relationships, reduce conflicts, and improve emotional well-being. By consistently applying these communication strategies, individuals can better navigate complex social dynamics while maintaining dignity and mutual respect.

References

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