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This discussion involves exploring the Relational Dialectics Theory to identify tensions in personal relationships. Select a relationship such as a friend or family member. Describe the relationship type, then analyze the following tensions with at least four sentences each, including examples:
- Autonomy/connection tension: Identify which is the norm.
- Closedness/openness tension: Identify which is the norm.
- Novelty/predictability tension: Identify which is the norm.
Additionally, compare and contrast your answers with a peer’s post, noting similarities and differences to highlight the uniqueness of each relationship.
Paper For Above instruction
The application of Relational Dialectics Theory provides a profound lens through which to examine the complex and often contradictory tensions present in personal relationships. These tensions, as outlined by Baxter and Montgomery (1996), are inherent in every relationship and serve as a dynamic force shaping interactions and relational development. This essay explores the three primary tensions—autonomy/connection, closedness/openness, and novelty/predictability—within my relationship with my sibling, illustrating how each manifests and the norms that characterize them.
Relationship Description
I share a sibling relationship with my older brother, which has been characterized by a balance of closeness and independence. This relationship has evolved over the years from childhood camaraderie to a more adult, nuanced connection. The relationship is built on mutual support, shared experiences, yet also includes periods where both of us seek autonomy and personal space. Understanding how these tensions play out helps me appreciate the ongoing negotiation that sustains our relationship.
Autonomy/Connection Tension
The autonomy/connection tension revolves around the desire for independence versus the need for closeness. In my relationship with my brother, autonomy tends to be the norm. We often pursue separate interests and activities to maintain our individual identities. For example, I value my personal space and time to pursue my hobbies without interference, which reflects the norm of independence. However, we also experience moments where connection becomes important, such as during family gatherings or when seeking emotional support. These occasions temporarily shift the norm towards a more connected state, yet independence remains a dominant theme.
Closedness/Openness Tension
The closedness/openness tension involves balancing information sharing and privacy. In this relationship, openness is generally the norm. We share personal experiences and feelings openly, fostering trust and understanding. For instance, I regularly discuss my career plans and personal challenges with my brother, which enhances our emotional bond. Nonetheless, there are boundaries; I reserve some personal matters, such as financial details or relationship issues, for privacy reasons. This selective openness preserves respect while maintaining transparency, illustrating the tension's fluid nature.
Novelty/Predictability Tension
The novelty/predictability tension pertains to balancing familiar routines with excitement and spontaneity. In my relationship, predictability tends to be the norm, providing comfort and stability. We follow established traditions during holidays and birthdays, and routine interactions strengthen our bond. However, occasional surprises, like spontaneous outings or unexpected gestures, introduce novelty. These moments of unpredictability refresh our relationship and prevent monotony, though predictability remains the preferred mode for a sense of security.
Comparison with a Peer’s Relationship
Comparing my relationship with a friend, I notice that the autonomy/connection tension manifests differently. While my sibling relationship leans towards autonomy, friendships often fluctuate more dynamically between independence and closeness based on circumstances. For example, a friend may become more dependent during stressful periods or more distant when busy. Additionally, the openness versus closedness sometimes varies; friends tend to share more personal details quickly, whereas sibling relationships may have more established boundaries. Both relationships demonstrate the fluid negotiation of these tensions, but the context and intensity differ, highlighting the diversity in relational dynamics.
Conclusion
The application of the Relational Dialectics Theory reveals that tensions are not merely conflicts but opportunities for growth and understanding within relationships. Recognizing which tension is the norm allows individuals to navigate their relationships more intentionally. Whether it’s balancing independence with closeness or tradition with novelty, these tensions shape the ongoing dance of relational life, emphasizing their central role in relational resilience and development.
References
- Baxter, L. A., & Montgomery, B. M. (1996). Relating: Dialogues and dialectics. Guilford Press.
- Helgeson, V. S. (2017). Social support and well-being. In S. B. Silver (Ed.), Social psychology (pp. 211-244).
- Roloff, M. E. (1987). Communication processes in close relationships. AKA the dialectics of intimacy and independence. Communication Yearbook, 10, 130-158.
- Locher, M. A., & Dunn, J. (2010). Children’s development of privacy regulation during early childhood. Journal of Child Language, 37(2), 251-278.
- Petronio, S. (2002). Boundaries of privacy: Dialectics of disclosure. SUNY Press.
- Fine, G. A. (1999). Difficult conversations: A dialectical perspective. Journal of Contemporary Ethnography, 28(2), 124-160.
- Olson, D. H., et al. (2008). Circumplex model of family systems. Journal of Family Psychology, 22(3), 392-400.
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- Bartholomew, K., & Horowitz, L. M. (1991). Attachment styles among young adults. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61(2), 226-244.
- Moon, S., & Zivadinov, B. (2019). Life narratives and relational dialectics. Journal of Narrative Theory, 49(4), 415-438.