For Your Revisions, Focus On 1 Thesis

For Your Revisions I Suggest Focusing On 1 Thesis The Thesis Star

For your revisions, I suggest focusing on: 1. Thesis - The thesis started well, however, remember that the thesis is the blueprint of the paper. It should the purpose and main idea of your essay to your audience. Your thesis statement conveys your position on a topic and provides focus for your essay. If it does not effectively state your purpose and/or does not accurately convey your position, it is not a complete thesis statement. Although you did a great job in stating your stance, you want to try to make it clear and concise. Ideally, it would be a maximum of two sentences to do so. A great example would be “Factors related to student success (topic) includes effective time management (point 1), motivation (2), and family support (final point).” For more information, please refer to the following: 2. Topic Sentences - Your topic sentence is the point of the paragraph. The “why” of the paragraph. It should follow the thesis statement in order and it should state the claim/idea/point of the paragraph clearly and concisely. If it does not follow the thesis statement, it can cause the audience to become confused as the thesis is the blueprint of the paper and having the topic sentences go outside of that order may negatively impact the organizational portion of the paper. For more information please refer to the following: 3. Paragraph development – The acronym PIE is a great way to ensure total paragraph development. Each piece of the acronym serves a distinct purpose and the absence of one piece can take away from total topic development. The absence of having each piece of this acronym fully developed can cause the paragraphs to appear undeveloped and without organization. This can detract from the totality of the content of your paper. For more information, please refer to the following: This is the feedback from the assignment... In the journal, you will carefully review the feedback... I identify three issues your writing specialist focused on in your rough draft (e.g., paragraph structure, proper use of quotations, thesis statement, etc. In what ways were those issues surprising? Describe what you learned from some of the feedback your writing specialist provided as explanations. Was the feedback helpful? Evaluate the usefulness of the paper review tool. In what ways did this activity improve your academic writing skills? Will you use the Ashford Writing Center to review your work in the future? Why or why not? 400 words... She also said the conclusion was very strong.

Paper For Above instruction

The detailed feedback provided on my previous draft primarily centered around three key issues: the clarity of my thesis statement, the organization of my topic sentences, and the development of my paragraphs using the PIE method. Reflecting on these critiques, I was initially surprised by the emphasis on the thesis statement because I believed my main argument was clear. However, the feedback illuminated how a well-crafted thesis functions as the blueprint for the entire paper, guiding both the writer and the reader through the intended argument. Understanding this has reinforced the importance of creating a concise and precise thesis statement that clearly states my position and the key points I plan to discuss.

The suggestions regarding topic sentences were particularly insightful. I learned that each topic sentence should act as a mini-thesis for its paragraph, directly supporting the overarching thesis and maintaining logical flow. This was a revelation because I had previously written topic sentences that were either too broad or not directly connected to my main argument. The emphasis on maintaining order chronologically or thematically has encouraged me to pay closer attention to the structural coherence of my writing, ensuring each paragraph serves a specific purpose aligned with my thesis.

Finally, the focus on paragraph development through the PIE method—Point, Illustration, Explanation—has been immensely helpful. I realized that neglecting any part of PIE can lead to underdeveloped paragraphs that weaken my overall argument. By thoroughly developing each point with relevant examples and explanations, I can enhance the clarity and persuasiveness of my writing. Practicing this will undoubtedly make my future drafts more cohesive and robust.

The feedback was incredibly helpful, as it broke down complex writing principles into actionable steps, allowing me to understand specific areas for improvement. Utilizing the paper review tool from the Ashford Writing Center was a valuable activity, enabling me to identify blind spots and refine my skills before submitting my work. It has increased my confidence in my writing abilities and provided me with practical strategies to enhance my clarity and organization. Moving forward, I certainly plan to use the Ashford Writing Center for future assignments, as I recognize the benefit of having a collaborative review process that can elevate the quality of my academic work.

Overall, the feedback has been eye-opening and constructive. It clarified many aspects of academic writing I was previously unsure about, such as the importance of a strong thesis, logical topic sentences, and thorough paragraph development. This activity has not only improved my current understanding but also equipped me with tools I can apply throughout my academic career. The strong conclusion in my draft reassures me that I am on the right track, and with continued use of these principles, I am confident in my ability to craft well-organized and compelling essays in the future.

References

  • Graff, G., & Birkenstein, C. (2018). They Say / I Say: The Moves That Matter in Academic Writing. W.W. Norton & Company.
  • Hacker, D., & Sommers, N. (2016). A Writer’s Reference. Bedford/St. Martin’s.
  • Race, P. (2007). The Lecturer’s Toolkit: A Practical Guide to Teaching, Assessment and Student Learning. Routledge.
  • Lunsford, A. A., & Ruszkiewicz, J. J. (2010). Everything’s An Argument. Bedford/St. Martin’s.
  • Roen, D. H. (2014). Writing Arguments and Applying Critical Thinking. Routledge.
  • Hyland, K. (2019). Academic Writing: A Handbook for International Students. Routledge.
  • The Purdue Online Writing Lab (OWL). (n.d.). Developing a Thesis Statement. https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/the_writing_process/thesis_statement.html
  • Turabian, K. L. (2018). A Manual for Writers of Research Papers, Theses, and Dissertations. University of Chicago Press.
  • Graff, G., & Birkenstein, C. (2017). They Say / I Say: The Moves That Matter in Academic Writing. W.W. Norton & Company.
  • Purdue University Writing Lab. (2020). Paragraph development. https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/academic_writing/paragraph_development.html

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